I’m Pamela: a successful, feisty, unapologetic advocate for women and their ability to create a life that they are on fire for, on their own terms.
Change Agent. Culture Curator. Fire Starter.
I am an executive, a certified coach, author, and speaker on a mission to make sure that more women have a seat at the table, whatever that table might be for her. You are likely to find me sipping a coffee, challenging my clients to step into their power and calling BS loud enough to put a crack in the glass ceiling.
My life has not always felt this aligned.
Early in my career, I was curious, resourceful, and on fire to make a positive impact – I was ambitious with a capital A. Though I was quickly told that my ambition made me a capital B and moreover ambition wasn’t an attractive trait for a woman.
I spent years of my life tempering my ambition while hustling for the approval of others; long hours and “yes” to everyone else chasing praise as a form of validation left me utterly exhausted.
I followed the rules of being a career woman. I worked overtime, often outperforming my peer group, I said ‘yes’ to every assignment and made it a point to continually over-deliver. I was convinced that if I stayed small, quiet, and humble and just worked really hard that someone would take notice and then my career would flourish.
I watched male coworkers advocate for themselves and get promotions. One day I walked into my supervisor’s office, provided detailed information of my performance, incredible feedback, and successes, and then made the ask for a promotion. “I think it would be great if my work was recognized through a promotion. I hope that my dedication to the company, my continued acceptance of new responsibilities and the recognition from coworkers and customers is enough for you to give this consideration. Would you please consider an opportunity for me to elevate to the next level”? The man who sat across from me, smiled slightly, “You are one of the hardest workers I know. Unfortunately, it would upset the leadership team if you were introduced right now. You will get this promotion; the timing just isn’t right”.
Fast forward a year, still 60+ hour work weeks, accolades, and certificates/awards, but no promotion.
I was burning out in my work life and in my home life.
My home life was a series of volunteer board responsibilities, shuttling kids, church commitments. I said “yes” to everything that I thought a good wife, mom, and woman should say yes to.
Doctors appointments, meals, homework, backpack checks, sweeping, dishes, mopping, laundry, and even more laundry.
I had the life I wanted; a successful career, wife, mother, contributing member of society – so why did I feel exhausted, frustrated and resentful?
Spoiler Alert – no one came to save me. No one showed up at my door to help me break free from the cage that I built for myself.
With no end in sight, no one saving me, and little joy left in the day I knew I had to make a change in my life. I had to live my life, on my terms.
I decided that I did not need to hustle for approval, that scraps of praise were not love and my self-worth was not predicated on being seen as selfless.
I dismantled what I thought I should be and how I should behave.
Brick by brick, I began to build a life that was made for me, by me – on my terms.
I am on a mission to ensure that women like you can say NO to things that don’t serve you and YES to things that light you on fire. I’m here to show you how. We’re building your life on your terms.