“Addiction to motion” is a dangerously seductive compulsion.
My addiction to motion manifested as a pure desire to achieve. I thought my ambition to achieve was healthy, after all, doesn’t everyone want to be successful? So, I stuffed my days with hustle, busyness, never uttered the word “no” and produced work that I busted my behind on and still felt it was likely not good enough.
Enter promotions and pay raises, which led me to believe this constant hustle produced positive results. The busyness was served with a side of a ceaseless feeling of being a complete fraud and bound to be found out – so I had to hustle harder.
The hustle, the never-enough, and the imposter syndrome are all too familiar and yet profoundly unhealthy. We need to move away from the addiction to motion, the need to please others and learn to be aware of what the real priorities are in our life.
I love the book, Present Over Perfect, by Shauna Niequist and I highly recommend you add it to your summer reading list. In this book, Shauna writes that her choice to stop creating a life of busyness and hustle allowed her to listen to her voice and articulate a vision for her life.
When you are feeling busy and burdened take a moment and ask yourself what exactly is keeping you busy, and is it worth it? Shauna issues a call to action asking “what do you need to burn down in your life to make space for a new way of living? What commitments, expectations, roles, and structures seem immovable until you start to move them, and find that when you do, everything changes”.
If you recognize some of these traits in yourself and desire to author your own story on your terms, then it is time to ask yourself the tough questions. Be honest with yourself and learn to listen to your voice to discover what sets your soul on fire and what is truly worth your energy and time.
The advice I am giving myself: breath, show up, do your best, and remember you are enough.